Gotcha Day! August 8, 2016

Before getting her: Oh my gosh it’s here. The day we’ve been thinking about and preparing for for 4 years, and yet I feel totally unprepared! After landing late last night, it took awhile to get settled in and settled down before we were able to lay down and attempt to sleep. I may have gotten 1 hour of sleep. I just was feeling too excited for today- kinda like when you’re having a baby the next day or getting married. You just lay awake thinking about the big day. Gotcha Day is like that. One of the biggest moments of our life, just like the birth of our 3 bio kids. But yet such a different experience than that!

I finally surrendered to sleep and put in my headphones to get some inspiration from Hillsong United. I’m digging the Empires album right now- of course I was at the concert just a few weeks ago, so I’m addicted! The words seep into my soul (sorry to be cheesy), and just makes me feel better and protected. After a few songs and time in prayer, I got up and worked on getting Scarlett’s stuff unpacked and set out for when we bring her back. This little activity got me excited and proud to bring her back as our daughter. 

Here are pics of our hotel room. Somehow we got a suite. The views from the 23rd floor are amazing!

Breakfast was again wonderful. The customer service at these hotels has been incredible. And thankfully we’ve run across many people working here who speak English. There’s a manager named David who told us to let him know how he can help. We asked for a crib in our room. Yep, it’s happening!

We saw these fish every morning when heading to breakfast.

After breakfast, we video chatted with the other kiddos back in Kansas. They were playing in the back yard and seemed totally content. Thank you, God. I’m seriously glad they aren’t missing me too much. We have the most amazing grandparents (and friends who’ve taken them in as well)! 

After that, we headed out to explore Guiyang City. It’s located in the Guizhou province- this is our daughter’s hometown. It’s so important that we take pics and get familiar with where she’s from, and we were excited to explore together.

                   

We didn't know what we were doing, so we accidentally ordered 2 potato dishes. They were so good though! 

A view of our hotel. The Novotel. Super nice. We had         

                                  a corner suite! 

Lunch before going to get Scarlett.

After (the day after- too crazy to write about on 8/8): The clock was tick tick ticking and I was watching every minute, feeling more nervous as the time got closer. My stomach was doing back flips and triple twists, but we decided to try a restaurant close by for lunch. It had been recommended by another family who recently adopted from Guizhou. I couldn’t tell you the name of it, but it was delicious. There were pictures to point to, but truly we had no clue what besides rice we were ordering. One of the waitresses spoke some English and she tried her best, but there was still a language barrier. I feel bad not knowing their language. So, we ended up with 2 potato dishes. They were so yummy, but we got a kick out of our ordering fail. After lunch, we headed back up to the room to get our things ready to meet Kasumi (our guide) in the lobby at 2:00. I sat on the bed and just stared into space for a bit- no idea how to feel or react in this moment. Nathan was so sweet- always hugging me and checking on me. We got into the elevator and talked about how it was similar to having our first baby- driving to the hospital for our scheduled c-section, no idea how to feel. Only this seemed scarier to me. 

Kasumi and a guy that she was training, Constantine, were waiting for us in the lobby. They were cool cucumbers- these young college age kids- I’m sure we looked freaked out. 

The drive to the adoption center was neat- we got to see more of Guiyang City and I have to say, it’s a very neat place. If I were going to live in China, this would be a great place. The weather is great too. Much cooler and less humid than in Beijing. Constantine and Kasumi spoke really good English and conversations with them made our day seem more normal, and was a great distraction. Constantine told us that he’s a recent new dad to a 4 month old baby girl. He said that he knows how we feel… I was like kinda, but man this is not the same! 

Before we knew it, we were at the adoption center and getting out of the van with all of our stuff. A backpack full of paperwork, water, snacks and gifts. A unicorn backpack for Scarlett, filled with toys, puffs, books, and bubbles. We took the elevator to the 24^th floor and the rest happened so fast. I passed my phone to Kasumi so she could video tape and the minute we walked into the room, there she was, sitting on a couch in a beautiful frilly white dress, looking just like her pictures only more gorgeous! My heart was pounding, I was in shock that this moment was actually happening and I was seeing her live. 

First pic

Getting to know mama

Our first selfie

Paperwork- Daddy's got it this time! 

Scarlett and her foster grandma, Yin Gui Fen

Our first family photo

A special photo with Yin Gui Fen, Foster Grandma

We worked on paperwork through this whole process, taking turns signing our names and putting a red thumb print on each signature. As I was doing my signatures, Nathan was interacting with Scarlett- I looked over and she was putting puffs in his mouth and laughing. This was the sweetest moment, and I could tell she was already trusting him. She did it to me, too, and we just laughed together. She’s so precious. Such a sweet personality, but with some spunk, too! 

The paperwork was double-checked, we gathered our stuff, and headed out of the adoption center. Nathan carried her out. The stares were much worse now that we also had an Asian baby in our posse! By this time, I’m learning to not take it personally and ignore it or just put my perma-grin on. As we were waiting for the driver, Scarlett started getting fussy and we could tell that she was exhausted. She has a bottle that is her comfort, so we gave that to her and she was happy. Once in the car, she fell asleep on Nathan almost immediately. How precious it was to see our baby girl letting us care for her.

We headed to Walmart to get a stroller and a few other items. Nathan stayed in the car while Kasumi and Constantine took me inside. How do I describe the Guiyang Walmart? It’s something to behold. It is completely underground and at least the size (I think actually bigger) than a Walmart in the states. Seriously. It’s crazy. And it was crowded- lots of people everywhere (but since it was a Monday afternoon, it wasn’t actually crowded…). We quickly got what we needed and got back to the van. Did I already say that kids don’t ride in car seats here? Oh no- they ride on your lap, which is just crazy because the driving is like nothing I’ve ever seen! I can’t believe that a.) we’ve only seen 1 accident, and 2.) we haven’t been in an accident ourselves! 

We made it back to the hotel with Scarlett still sleeping (she woke up when we had to get out of the van and only seemed mildly confused for a bit- no crying). After getting to the hotel room, we showed her some toys and tried to play. It was clear that she was still tired, so we laid her down with a bottle on the bed and she was asleep very quickly. At this time, the people came into our hotel room to do the money currency exchange for the orphanage donation and other fees. Since it’s so much money, it’s done in the hotel room which is a good thing. 

You go in the doors and down escalators. Their Walmart is probably bigger than ours and it's all underground! 

Walmart is under this. 

This is the parking garage entrance. We went there twice. A memorable experience for sure!

They don't let you take pics there. I'm such a rebel. 

Sleeping in the hotel room after the exhausting afternoon. 

The bottle is her comfort. 

I'm biased, but I just think this the most precious thing ever. She was made perfect. 

We woke Scarlett up at 5:00 and got ready for dinner. We went down to the restaurant in our hotel and it was surreal to have Scarlett at the table with us. We had no idea what to order for her or how she was fed (was her food cut up into pieces? Did foster grandma feed her or did she eat with her hands?). We ordered a few things and found out that this child loves to eat! We tried to give her a shrimp dumpling, but it turns out that she wanted the green veggies. Maybe she’ll teach the other kids how to eat healthy. She also loved the noodles. She insisted on feeding herself and us- she loved putting noodles in mom and dad’s mouths, too. We had a blast with her at dinner. She came alive and we just fell more in love with her spunky personality. She laughed and smiled a lot. She said “Ahhh” and opened her mouth so we’d mimic her and let her feed us. She danced. She sang. She was a happy happy girl with food in her belly! We were so glad to have some feeding questions answered. We’re starting to put the pieces of the puzzle together. 

We did a quick change before dinner- didn't want to get food all over her white frilly dress!

This smile. It's the best. It lights up the room!

She loves to make faces and be silly

She likes to feed us, too. Sometimes it comes out of her mouth and she wants to put it in ours!

After dinner, we played in the little kid’s playroom that’s in the restaurant. There’s not a lot to do in there, but Scarlett liked walking around and interacting with me. We did lots of kissing- she loves to play games and mimic what you do. She makes faces and laughs at herself a lot. She kept throwing her hands in the air and laughing. She was wearing a shirt that says, “Best Day Ever.” This sums it up. It really was the best day. My faith was strengthened as I saw God keep the promises He’d made to us years ago. This gift that He gave us today is truly a miracle and something that we’ll treasure forever. We laid Scarlett down for bed at 8:00 in the crib and she fell asleep on her own (with the bottle, of course). Fingers crossed for a great night of sleeping for everyone. Tomorrow is our first full day together!

Best Day Ever! What a day!!

Day 4 Beijing sightseeing #2 and heading to Guiyang

After a video chat with Grandma and Grandpa Gronberg, Riley, and Addison (it was 7am in the States and Chase buddy was still asleep), we went to bed around 9:30pm. I fell asleep fast, but then woke up at 3:00am and was wide awake. And then the thoughts came. So many thoughts starting with, “tomorrow is Gotcha Day. TOMORROW. THE DAY.” And then I started freaking out. Like my heart was doing a little pound and my tummy had butterlies. Honestly, it’s been so nice just Nathan and I, unplugged mostly, and enjoying exploring China together. But, we’re here because there’s a little girl waiting for us. Well, not really waiting for us- she doesn’t know that she’s waiting, but you know what I mean.

At 3:30am, Nathan was also wide awake. We knew we had a full day of exploring to do and that the night before Gotcha Day would also be restless, so we tried to go back to sleep… at 5am, we finally got up and turned on the Olympics. We worked on packing our suitcases and rearranging to get each checked bag to be 44 pounds.

At 6am, we headed to another delicious breakfast. Seriously, we are loving the food here. The hotel really tries to cater to Westerners. They do it good.

At 7am, we headed to Starbucks. Because Starbucks in Beijing. That’s where I got this mug (thanks for reminding me, Marie Riley). It was a rainy morning, and we sat outside enjoying our 2^nd coffee for the day (Nathan reading a book, and me writing in my journal). I was in yoga pants and a jacket. It was glorious. It was like this rain came in and just wiped away all of the crap in the air.

At 8:30 we met our guide, Gia in the lobby (the other ladies had flown out earlier in the morning to Judah’s province- their Gotcha day was today). Gia took us to Tien’nman square. It was still sprinkling and she was like in shock that we didn’t have an umbrella (I’d heard that we didn’t need to pack one because the hotels had them- maybe they did, we didn’t ask- sprinkles aren’t going to hurt). It was neat to see a different part of Beijing, and the rain had literally washed out the smog so we could see the buildings. As we got closer to the square, we could see masses of people visiting. Gia tells us that Beijing locals don’t really come to these places, so all of the people are foreigners- from different Provinces of China. It became really obvious when they were all staring at us. I mean blatantly staring- so rude. We are wonders to behold, I guess. Haha. The people of China also don’t know about personal space- there isn’t shoving or pushing or anything, but everyone is just okay to be really close or touching when in a crowd.

Oh I can’t skip over my 2^nd experience with the squatty potty. You guys. THIS. I know I have to, but it’s my LEAST favorite thing right now. The Great Wall was a nice clean squatty. But let’s be honest. If one isn’t used to the squatty, one doesn’t do it right. Pee splattering everywhere. Sorry to be gross, but others coming behind me need to know. The squatty potties are stupid, and I’m sure you’ll hate them too. There needs to be handles at least to hold onto and get the proper stance, but alas there is not, so you’re holding onto the wall. If you’re wearing shorts or pants, you have to slip your foot that has walked in other’s pee through the hole in one leg, and then your underwear. The best scenario would be to wear a dress and no underwear really, but who does that?! This is why they are stupid in my opinion. So, you have to hold your underwear and pants in one hand because you don’t want those slipping down and landing on the floor in other’s splatter… Then when you’re done, you have to put your foot back through underwear and shorts. I was wearing sandals today, so I literally took my shoe off. Am I doint this wrong? If someone has instructions please let me know ASAP before my next experience! So the squatty potty at Tien’nman square smelled like Emporia, KS. Like cow poo. But after all of the coffee and water I’d drank that morning, there was no getting around it. I had to go in. Oh and most places don’t have TP, so you have to bring it or shake it off. I’m not going to tell you about it. I don’t want to relive it. Just know that my second experience was NASTY. Tonight I’ll be up with nightmares. And I’ll bet this isn’t the grossest squatty I’ll experience either. Hmmm maybe by the time we leave, I’ll be an expert. Changing Scarlett’s diapers ought to be something, too.

 

So, Tien’nman square. It was neat to see the Chinese buildings and memorials that are so important to them. We took lots of pictures to show the kids and Scarlett someday. The Summer Palace Museum is across the street from the square, so we went there next. There were gobs of people there. Like take walking into the Royal’s stadium during a world series game and times that by 3, maybe even more. And the fact that we were there on a weekend made it worse. AND Gia said that it actually wasn’t that busy because of the rain! And almost everyone had umbrellas or ponchos- even though it was just sprinkling. We guessed that it was to keep the polluted rain off. The Chinese are super health conscious. We’ve maybe seen 2 overweight people, and I’m telling you, we’ve seen a lot of people. Now that I write about it and look back, man those were huge crowds! And everyone was staring at us- I never felt unsafe, but maybe uncomfortable a few times when they held their stare for so long.

At least it wasn’t too hot or humid (thank you, God for that rain). We shuffled through each gate and were more and more and more and more and more amazed as the palace museum just kept going and going. Those emperors lived quite the life of luxury! This place was gorgeous. Built in the 1400’s. I can’t do it any justice by trying to describe it here. And it wasn’t really a museum like you’d think of a museum. The imperial garden at the end was just breathtaking. This was my favorite place that we visited with The Great Wall coming in for a close 2^nd.

Our check out time was at 2:00, so we headed back to the hotel to get our things. Then we headed to eat a late lunch. Gia took us to a hot pot restaurant. THIS. Oh my. We died and went to heaven. This was the most amazing food. Gia told us that she can go to that sort of place with a small group, so there’s a pro to being the only ones in the group! We paid a little extra (lunch was included in our travel package for Beijing) to experience this place. So there’s a big pot of boiling broth water in the middle of the table. You can pick mild or spicy or both (we got both- the white looking one is mild). And then you order veggies and meats to put in the broth. And you pick your sauce. I put some kid of sesame mix sauce as the base for mine and added garlic, cucumber bits, crushed peanuts, and a few other things. So, you dump the stuff in the water and once it’s cooked, you use your chopsticks and just start grabbing it out- and you dip it in your sauce. Someone needs to open one of these in KC!! They would make a fortune. We could’ve sat there all day picking stuff out of that broth. And it was so healthy- we ate like 3 different types of mushrooms, green veggies I’ve never heard of before, beef, lamb, and shrimp. If you go to China, try a hot pot restaurant. You’ll be glad you did!

After lunch, we headed to the Bird’s Nest- where the 2008 Olympics was held. By this time, the sun was out and we saw blue sky. I’m so glad we got to see Beijing in this light- yesterday was kind of depressing with all of the pollution in the air. We saw some really cool places and buildings in Beijing today- we’re amazed at how many residential buildings there are. Some super old and some super fancy. There seems to be either poor or rich here, not as much in between, as far as I can see. The bird’s nest was neat. There was some sort of festival going on so there was a live band and lots of action. We also saw the tower and the water cube.

We are now at the airport, waiting on our flight to Guiyang where Scarlett is. We’ll get to explore her province and get to know her before flying to Guangzhou on Friday afternoon. We won’t get to the hotel until probably 11pm at the earliest. I’m excited to unpack our suitcases and get her stuff ready. We’ll bring her backpack and some things we got for her when we go to meet her tomorrow. I CAN’T BELIEVE I’M SAYING THAT. TOMORROW. The next time you see a blog post from me, it will be about Gotcha Day. I know you can’t wait. I sure can’t!!

Day 3 Sightseeing in Beijing

We've had quite the day! Because of the time change, we were up and at it very early this morning (Nathan at 3:30am, me at 5:00am). We headed to the Starbucks that is in our hotel at 6am, but it didn't open until 7am, so we went to have breakfast. I had heard that breakfast is amazing, and man today's was amazing. The hotel also had latte that was complimentary, so I was happy (we had some language barrier issues finding this out, but luckily there was a guy there that spoke Chinese and English, so he saved the day). It's hard to describe what the breakfast buffet looked like- there was so much to choose from, and many items you'd think were more like a lunch choice. I loved the little egg rolls they had!

After breakfast, we headed across the street (traffic wasn't too bad on a Saturday at 6:30am, so we got across pretty easily). I threw a pair of tennies in at the last minute but forgot to pack socks, and I had seen some at the convenience store the day before. It was neat to see Beijing in action. There were dumplings being made fresh in the street, there were bike carts preparing other fresh meals for commuters to purchase.


We headed over to Starbucks- never too much caffeine when you're up as early as we've been the last few days! It feels like such a treat to have this right here in our hotel. I hope we have easy access in Guiyang as well!

We met our guide and 2 other people from our group at 8:30. Christy and her daughter Kimberlyn had come to be with Christy's sister, Jenny, who is adopting a little 2 year old boy. Jenny and her husband, Jacob, have adopted 3 other kids from China, so they decided that just Jenny would come this time. Kimberlyn is 12 years old, so we enjoyed being in the company of a kid! We headed to The Great Wall. It took over 2 hours to get there because of the crazy Saturday traffic. So apparently, you are told what days you can drive on- odd numbers drive on these days, even numbers on the other days (the number is on the license plate), but everyone can drive during the weekend, so it's just busier than during the week. We enjoyed the people watching! We saw kids squatting on the side of busy roads to go to the bathroom (many wearing split pants also, which is kind of alarming to see- bare butts hanging out...). One kid we saw was completely naked, just chilling on the side of the road with his mom. So many people ride bikes and scooters, and no one yields for anyone- their merges are insane. I don't know how there aren't more accidents! What an experience, for sure!

We came to realize after talking a bit that Jenny's husband, Jacob is the pediatrician we'd talked to at length for the first file we received on a child, the child he had to say no to. We also talked to him about Scarlett's file, for a second opinion! I can't believe I didn't put it all together before now. It's neat how God puts people in your life and then again down the road- complete strangers who become friends due to common experiences!


The Great Wall was... well, GREAT. Oh my gosh it's amazing. Even with the crazy humidity and sweat dripping into my eyes I thoroughly enjoyed trekking up those steep steps. I made it as far as I could, and then turned and came back down (coming down was harder than going up, in my opinion.
Nathan had turned around before me because his leg started hurting, and he didn't realize that once you get to a certain height, you come down a different way. So, after about 30 minutes of not being able to find him, I saw him where he'd left us and I had to take my shaking legs back up a bit to fetch him. He felt terrible because he had the backpack that contained the extra water, my kleenexes, and all of the money. We did a little shopping in the gift shop and headed back to the air-conditioned van. We have the nicest driver and guide. I also experienced my first squatty potty at the wall.

After that, we headed to the Jade Factory for lunch. It was a delicious traditional Chinese meal. They didn't have forks, so we ate with chopsticks. They also don't really use serving spoons, so you just dip your chopstick into the dish and grab what you can. We shared germs like champs- what a way to get to know someone. Haha! It felt great to sit down and get refreshed. After lunch, we were given a little tour of the jade factory- so cool to see how they carve it, and then walked around looking at things that we couldn't buy (the sales lady followed us around, asking what we wanted to buy). 

Then we headed to the Summer Palace. This was a very neat place, too, although the crowd was pretty insane. I was feeling a little closed in with all of those people in the heat, but then we got to the corridors and there was a nice breeze coming off of the lake and gorgeous views of the palace and lake. What a history! 

We headed back to the hotel to freshen up just a bit (deodorant and febreeze spray), and then met back in the lobby for dinner. Jenny had arrived by that time, so she joined us for dinner. It was nice to get advice from her since she's adopted 3 times before. We enjoyed roasted duck tonight along with a variety of other foods (Gia ordered way too much for us, and we ended up wasting a lot) at dinner tonight with our group. I'm so thankful for these other people who are traveling some of the trip with us. We said goodbye to them tonight and will meet up with them on Friday in Guangzhou where the U.S Consulate is. At that time, we'll have 2 little ones added to our group. I'm so excited but nervous at the same time!

In about 36 hours, we'll have Scarlett. I've enjoyed these few days with just my husband. We needed this time together before becoming a family of 6!

Beijing, Day 1/2

Well we made it and I have to say it's surreal to be here! The flight was great- I loved relaxing and resting, enjoying the alone time with my husband. I was blown away by how nice the plane was. All 3 meals were delicious (sea salt caramel gelato... yes please!), and the tv's on the back of the seats made the trip bearable for me. I watched 3 new releases, and enjoyed playing solitaire, too. I wish I could've napped a bit, but am prayerful that I'll get some great sleep tonight and be ready for sight seeing tomorrow!

Right now, it's 6:45pm. For those of you in KC, it's 5:45AM. I wish I could call my kiddos right now, but they are sleeping. Am hoping to connect with them in the morning, but they might be out and about with Grandma and Grandpa.

After landing in Dallas, we had a 1 hr and 45 min lay over- this was the perfect amount of time to grab a starbucks and hit the big bathrooms! After landing in Beijing and getting our bags and going through customs, we were met by a man and woman who took us to a van and drove us about 30 minutes to our hotel (it was a bit strange just getting in the van with them, fully trusting that our agency hired these people...). The traffic here is pretty crazy. We saw all kinds of things- I couldn't believe when I saw a family of 3 on a motorized scooter- the 3 year old boy was standing at the front, holding onto the handle bars as they weaved through traffic. Lots of honking around here, and pedestrian crosswalks don't mean much (Nathan and I got through 1/2 of the street on the way back to the hotel after dinner and just stood in the middle of the street because no one would let us go! It's just a different way of thinking as far as I can tell- I'm going to have to be more aggressive I can tell. No more Mrs. nice Kansas girl! Haha!

So, the nice people checked us in at our hotel, showed us how to trade in our money and told us that we'd find the convenient store across the street from the hotel (you can't drink the tap water here, so getting bottled water was a must). Nathan told me not to sit down- we needed to keep walking so we wouldn't fall asleep too early- for us, we've been up now for 24 hours... we're hoping to get on China time after a good nights sleep. We walked around our hotel a bit (I found a Starbucks that I can visit first thing in the morning, too), and then ventured out to find that convenience store and somewhere to eat dinner. Right across the street is an Irish Pub. We will try Chinese food while we're here, but it was comforting to get some good old pizza! The coasters that they gave us were Boulevard Brewing Company, which is a beer brewing company out of Kansas City, MO. Nathan got a kick out of that.

I really was just feeling so tired and in need of a shower, so we got our water bottles after our dinner and headed back to the hotel (this is when we got stuck in the middle of the road). I took a quick shower, and when I got out I found Mr. Nathan snoring on the bed... hmmm so much for trying to stay up for another hour. So, to bed at 6:30pm for him. I tried to tell him to wake up, but he ignored me. We'll see what that means for tomorrow!

Our room is nice, but it smells like smoke pretty bad, so I'm super glad that I brought my essential oils diffuser and oils to make the room smell better.

We are meeting our guide and the other people hanging with us in the morning at 8:30am (6:30pm central standard time) to head to the Great Wall. I hear it's a 3 hour ride. Not looking forward to that, but I'm enjoying the sights of our daughter's birth country, so am determined to take it all in.

Here are some pics from today:

We put a gift and note on each of the kid's beds for them to find when they got home this morning from sleeping over at Grandma and Grandpa's. I love giving gifts!

Our awesome neighbor, Kim Lewis, took us to the airport bright and early!

The first leg of our journey- flying to Dallas!

This is the journal I got to write to Scarlett all about how she came to be our daughter and the journey to get her!

The Starbucks lady at the Dallas airport spelled my name "Jennie" and I like it. Think I should change how I spell my name. Random, yes. I'm going on little sleep!

 This one is from when I facetimed the kids while we were waiting to take off for Beijing. This was right when they'd gotten to the house and saw their first gift!

Our route- loved watching this on the screen on the plane.

Our first plane meal. This was yummy!

I played quite a bit of solitaire, too!

IT'S HERE

Well it's here... in 24 hours we'll be at the airport starting our journey to China to get Scarlett. It's a moment we've been waiting for for about 4 years. It sounds cliche but it truly feels like just yesterday that we started this process in the Ethiopia program. At that time, Chase was less than 2 years old. Our wait time was only supposed to be 18-24 months which seemed perfect for us.
Ha ha ha right. So, God knew what He was doing (imagine that)! Adding another child to the family with Chase as a 3 year old (or 4 year old for that matter... and honestly, right now is still pushing it, but we've got kindergarten coming) would have pushed me over the edge. The 3rd child has a way of humbling your "awesome parenting skills," at least it did in our experience.

Fast forward a few years of waiting on the Ethiopia list, and here we are getting ready to adopt from CHINA. It's funny because our choice was between China and Africa to begin with... and we both just felt pulled to Africa. There's always a lesson to be learned, and ours was that sometimes God changes your path. What we learned from the switch was to trust in God, how to hear His voice in our life, and PATIENCE- this is the big one that I struggle with. This entire process is a big fat waiting game. Waiting for this, then waiting for that, all in other people's control... this is not fun for someone with a Type A personality!! It was neat to sit by a gorgeous stream in Colorado with Nathan and pray for the future of our family together and for God to give us perfect peace in our decision. As days passed the peace that we prayed for continued to grow and we started the process to switch countries. Saying goodbye to Africa was sad. We felt like we were abandoning our daughter, but we knew that this was what we were supposed to do, so we did it. Our daughter was not from Africa, that was clear. What a faith journey we've been on. It is because God says so- we can't see the outcome, only He knows how this story plays out. But we press on because He loves us and we love Him. Pretty simple!

This means we got to do all of that 6 months of paperwork we'd prepared (when I say we, I mean I) for Ethiopia over again to send to China. This was frustrating for me- I had to tell myself over and over to persevere and it would of course be rewarded and we'd get our daughter. Onward we go.

And then there's the PEOPLE! You guys have been insanely encouraging and supportive. Honestly, we could not be doing this without our people! Too many to list here, but all of the financial support from friends and family and STRANGERS, encouraging words from friends and family, and the friends and family who will be watching our kids and pets while we're gone. And my personal favorite, the prayers from friends, family and strangers! We are ever grateful for the people that God has put in our life at such a time as this to be involved in this magical story! I was a new Christ follower when we started this journey, and man have I seen God show up in MIGHTY ways these last 4 years. God is REAL, and my biggest dream is that EVERYONE can know Him!

Scarlett is going to know Him. I've been crying myself through church for many months as we get closer and closer to bringing this child that God picked just for our family home. We get to tell her that Jesus is the one that answered our prayers, prayers we never knew we had. Jesus is the one who has known her from the foundation of the earth and will love her better than we ever can, and that Jesus is the one writing this story. We get to teach her that no matter what she is loved, adopted, chosen, forgiven and redeemed by the creator of the world.Who knows what life would be like for her growing up in China, especially with a special need that is so visible. God made her perfect and she'll be told that she's beautiful and cherished every day. Oh wait, that's just like my story! My heavenly father feels the same way about me! :-)

Back to adoption. Can you guys tell that I'm a God girl? I get going... I know.

When we get Scarlett on Monday- Gotcha Day! From our point of view, we are gaining a daughter. We've been laboring through paperwork, finances, meetings, trainings and more for the past 4 years to get to this day. The day we hold her and tell her how much we love her and that she will never be ever be without a family again. While we're excited about this, there's also her side of the story. Many people don't understand that there's a tragedy that happens in adoption. Scarlett has lost a lot in her short life. Her birth parents. On Monday, her foster parents- the only parents she's known. She's particularly close with the foster grandma I hear. She hasn't been able to prepare for this like we have. She is going to be handed over to us- these foreigners who don't speak her language or look like her. And her foster family is going to go home without her (bless them, seriously). She's going to be scared. Gotcha day for her and gotcha day for us will not be the same. Saying that the grief that she's about to face breaks my heart doesn't fully capture the feelings I'm having. Once we have her, we have her. And we take her back to our hotel. This child of ours that we are just meeting at 22 months old. She doesn't know that she can trust us the way our babies did in those first moments after birth. She might kick and scream and push us away when we try to pick her up. The grief that she experiences is a good thing as painful as it is- it means that she loved someone and was attached with someone, and grieving is a healthy thing- it's part of the process. All that I can do is pray that God equips us to do and be whatever Scarlett needs us to be in that moment and in the moments to come. We can't do this on my own, but I'm not afraid- ya'll know God will be right there with us, encouraging and strengthening us as we push forward each day as He already has worked out every detail of this entire process. There is nothing too big for Him that He can't handle and that hasn't already passed through His hands!

I'm excited to explore China with our daughter- we'll load up our camera with pics from our adventure to show her as she grows up. I'm going to miss my kids (and dogs) something fierce while we're away, but I'm going to cherish every moment spent in Scarlett's country because who knows if we'll be back?! I want to take it all in and get to know the culture and fall in love with where she's from.  We'll buy her gifts to give at milestone birthdays and pearls for her wedding. We'll make lifelong friends who are adopting a sweetie from China at the same time- we can look back and laugh at the memories made together. We'll get on a plane and fly for 15ish hours back to the USA where she'll become a citizen of our country the minute we land. At that time, her Chinese citizenship is gone (China doesn't recognize dual citizenship)- I have mixed feelings about this. It's exciting, but at the same time feels like we're taking something from her.

And before we know it, we'll be home. A family of 6. This is when things get real. I'm not naive enough to think that it's all going to a fairytale ending at this point. It's going to take time for our kids to bond. She's almost 2, so she'll be doing those adorably annoying toddler things that big kids just can't stand. There will be less time for Riley, Addison and Chase and most of our attention will be focused on Scarlett. How will Chase respond to being a big brother and no longer the baby of the family? I think he's ready for this role, but I know we'll have tough days. It's going to be important for me and Nathan to set aside personal time with the 3 big kids- we'll be pulled in many different directions. I don't mind. Having kids is sacrificing yourself, becoming selfless, and it's worth it. It's the best thing in the world. I still can't believe that God entrusted these humans to me. What a blessing. I don't take it lightly.

So, here's what you guys can do (if you made it this far, thanks for hanging in with my rambling). I know that so many people have prayed for and loved this little girl right along with us and want so badly to scoop her up! And you will get your time, I promise. However, it's so important that we hunker down as best we can and focus on attaching with her. The phrase is called cocooning. If you are in our circle, I encourage you to read this article about cocooning: http://www.nohandsbutours.com/2015/09/09/cocooning/
We plan on doing this as much as possible, to teach her who mom and dad are. We will meet every need she has to build trust and attachment. The challenging part is that we have to meet every need and not let people like grandparents, babysitters, friends, or others be able to interact with her in ways they'd love to just yet.  So, if you see us after we get home, please understand that we're not trying to be rude if we don't let you hold her. We're not being overprotective. We're teaching her what a mom and dad is. We just want what is best for our daughter.

And finally to close... my next blog post will be from Beijing, China (if I can get the internet to work, Lord willing). Please pray for us. All of us. We can feel the prayers already.

Oh I almost forgot! There's something else you can do if you're in our area... meals, bring us meals! Fresh meals, frozen meals, gift cards for meals. We have a 3 freezers at our house. We are going to be DOG tired (did I mention that we get in at 10pm on Wednesday, August 17th and will get up bright and early he next day (if we sleep at all that night) to kids who will be ecstatic to see us and meet their sister (and get gifts, I'm sure they'll be begging to see what we picked out for them)!!